Almost there

Almost to childfree bliss that is, well 5 day bliss, we're not giving them away or anything. But as I was typing up menus and ideas for the grandparents who are watching the kids, I started to worry. Not about my kids, not about our trip, but for my dear dear in-laws. I mean 5 days watching my kids, at my age it is rough, but at 60, thats even rougher. I am hoping and praying (literally) that their behavior will miraculously calm down for just this week, their yes mam's will be right on, and the tantrums and fights will fade away. Now it is true that grandmas have a much better way with kids then us mean ole crotchity parents, but still 5 days is long. Thankfully the Cables have almost an unending supply of patience, that for some reason I just didn't get.  So just a short little post letting you know we are getting ready for Aruba. I have no idea what we'll do for 5 days with no chores, errands or kids. We are bringing books, cards and dice (any other thoughts all you 10 followers? oh and keep it clean :) I still haven't decided on a swim suit from the 100 or so I ordered, still haven't decided if we want to fork out $50 to check a bag rather than cram it all into 2 little carryons, and most of all, I still need to go get a pedicure, so that my pasty white legs and feet don't scare off too many people. If I don't post before Wed, well think of me on the beach with my mai tai, my rockin new suit. But don't be too jealous, one thing you can count on is I won't return a bronze goddess, you'll never no I even set foot on the beach.

The depths of my love for Ritchey on Thanksgiving.

Oh Asparagus dish, oh how you will not let me escape you. Below you will get a step by step walk thru of my experience with Ritchey's only request for thanksgiving, asparagus dish. I know what you are saying right now, oh I love asparagus! Oh, and so do I. But I really don't think the nasty things I dumped out of the cans can really be called asparagus. They certainly didn't smell like asparagus, more like stale vomit, (I literally had to plug my nose) and they didn't feel like asparagus, but maybe more like a limp wet sock. oh wait that is what they smelt like too. Anyhoo. I'm not even going to go into the rest of the recipe cuz you will see it below. But I will say, this is a Cable family must have, they eat it by the panful at their holiday traditions, Donna (who married my brother in law) and I have both been initiated in the asparagus dish club. Even more mortifying was that I had to bring this to someone's house I had never been to before. But surprisingly many of them enjoyed it, that made Ritchey feel so much better, after the grief I gave him all day. So here you go, feast your eyes on this. And just so you don't go to bed with this as your last image I left you with my family's time honored recipe. Brown sugar and butter in one of the pictures, now that is heavenly. Happy late Thanksgiving. I hope everyone enjoys all the family traditions throughout the holidays, even the not so enjoyable ones like this.

 The hard boiled eggs really add the delicious aroma of the canned asparagus.

 What would a thanksgiving dish be without cream soups.

 I deviate a little from Janet's velveeta and went with sharp cheddar. I literally could not bring myself to cover anything with velveeta.

 Just when you hoped or thought it was over, the final touch, breadcrumbs (oh no, he wouldn't let me), rather SALTINES!!

 Look at that layered perfection.

 Now this is another story. Anything with brown sugar and butter can't go wrong. This is my mom's candied yam's recipe. And no, there are no marshmallows on this.

Here's to family recipes, the good and the bad!

I miss living with a girl!

Can I just say swimsuit shopping and feedback on clothes is just pointless with a man. Every time I buy a new outfit, get a new haircut, try on the dreaded swimsuit, I have to rely on pictures from a phone, or pictures by said useless man, and then send them off to my sister or some other girlfriend to get some real honest feedback. Today was really brutal, i took pictures in the winter with my muffin top and all, from all angles so that my sister could see whether my new swimsuit choices were truly brutal or not so bad. I threatened her with no laughing, no sharing with a single soul even her husband and no black mailing. But she is kinda used to it now. So yes, there are days I miss living with my roomate Rachel, living down the street from a good girlfriend, and shopping with my brutally honest sister. Sharing shoes, sharing opinions, and less eye rolls when I just can't make up my mind. So if you ever see me in an awful outfit, with an awful haircut, or hanging out of my suit in all the wrong places, just blame Ritchey and his manly lack of contructive feedback in all such things :)

Thoughts about raising kids.

So Ritch and I got in a serious child raising discussion the other night. I think I have mentioned that my boys have been in this neverending (like going on a year now) hyper mode phase. Its hard to enjoy dinner times, free time, family time, and all times in between because you are having to holler over their loudness, force them in the bath, force them in bed, and break up the fights. But more than outright disobedience it is just the energy they have which does lead to them not hearing a word we are saying. Anyhoo, Ritch in particular has not enjoyed this phase of parenting. It exhausts him physically and me mentally. He feels all he does from the minute he gets home is say, no, stop that, no, no, cut it out, time out, spanking, get in bed, quiet down, kinda stuff, and that is no fun. He was sharing all the fun memories of his childhood, and specifically commented that he was ever like this as a boy. Now granted we rarely remember what we were like, but I do believe that he was a quiet boy, always in his head, solving problems, etc. And the personality of he and his brother are different then ours. But its also hard not to examine our parenting, is there something we are doing that is causing such distruption and craziness. So since Ritchey can only compare our childrearing and homelife to that he had growing up, this is what he went on. The only conclusion Ritchey can come to is the fact that we lead a much more structured home life then he had growing up. His family never had bed times, never monitored t.v. time or junk food consumption, never had their kids get jobs in their teen years, no curfews, etc. Sam and Janet are very much go with the flow, flexible folks. And despite what most parenting books might say, they produced 3 excellent, responsible young men. Our house is quite different. We are in no way some authoritative prison like home. But we definitely have some boundaries. We have snacks at snack time rather then grazing all day, we have limits on t.v. time and video game time. We have a pretty consistent bedtime and nap times. We have family dinners most nights, battling with Cooper every night to choke down his food. We have homework time, clean up time, etc. etc. Now I personally don't feel that these structures are too, well structured. But Ritchey wonders. Are our kids having a fun and carefree childhood, or are we dictating their every move. It definitely got me thinking, I see his point. But when I break it down, I truly feel like all of these structures/routines are from my conviction and heart, and are best for my family. They are not decisions made on a whim or to have a controlled life. I truly don't want my kids watching t.v. at their whim. I don't want video games to be their go to activity, I want them to ask when they want a snack rather then have free reign of the junkfood drawer and so forth so on. I realize this is different in every family and I totally reserve judgement, but my heart of hearts just can't relax on it. I have this problem lots in life. I am pretty black and white when it comes to my personal convictions. Now thankfully, thanks to Romans, I have relaxed in how I apply my convictions to others, but for myself and my family, its hard to shake what I feel is best. I'm certainly open to discussion, as Ritchey and I did the other night, but it takes a very good argument or a massive movement of the spirit to show me otherwise. And let me interject that I am trying to say YES to their random crazy impulses more, reserving no to those things I feel strongly about. Anyhoo, So here are my conclusions, and I would definitely be open to some of yours. Ritchey thinks the boys are acting up because of all the rules/structures (but he couldn't name a rule or routine that he thinks should go), I think they are in this phase cuz of their ages. 7 years old is a not an older child with maturity and self discipline, but they are slowly trying to find their new independence, have wildly creative minds, and still tons of toddler energy. Cooper, my 5 year old, well that is all you have to say, 5 year old boy with an older brother. No longer is he this 3 or 4 year old toddler that just toddles around folllowing and obeying his brother, now he is a full on participant with his own crazy ideas and plans and voice. I dunno, any amens to these two ages. So combined, watch out. And Cooper especially is my free spirit, melodramatic one, which Ritchey's family never had thrown into the mix. And my second conclusion, is yes, my kids may not have the same fond memories that Ritchey has, like late nights with his parents, or cartoons all Saturday morning (although we do all snuggle in bed and watch a few cartoons together on Saturday), but they will have fun memories, just different memories. I dunno, maybe I'm making excuses. I do know that as Parker in particular ages, I need to figure out how to give him freedoms and independence. And I don't want them to look back on this time as a time they tried to break free. But I just don't feel that is what our family is like, I"m not sure Ritchey thinks that way either. The point is, we are trying our best (pretty much), we are seeking the Lord and following what I hope He is laying on our hearts, and we are trying to keep the dialogue going, remaining flexible over the years. I think our kids have  a good life. I think when we do follow our routines and our rules, I do it in love and most of the time tenderness. We all do damage to our kids in the long run, I hope ours is kept to a minimum. So as Ritch and I ended our discussion, our final thought, was, man, raising kids is hard. Especially if you want to do a good job. Ok, I vented. I don't post this necessarily looking for answers, although if you have some, do share. And I don't post this to hear feedback saying, "oh, no, you are doing a great job". I just do it to keep up the dialogue I suppose, and to be held accountable maybe, and well just to vent, cuz that is what a blog is all about. Thanks for listening to my more serious rantings this evening. Here is a pic of my wonderful little clan, just for the fun of it.

Will you Marry Me

So today Parker had a friend over, a friend who is a girl. Parker is totally not into girls, kinda understands what a girlfriend is, kinda doesn't. But he is a goofball. So in the car today he and his friend girl were in the way back of my smokin mini van. He leans over to her and says "You are lovely and I'm going to marry you and kiss you." At which he lunged for her to peck one on her. Now he didnt' say this in a sweet meaningful way, but in a teasing kinda way. She yelled back, "oh no your not mr. kissy bissy, you are gross and disgusting and crazy. Nice. He kept trying to lay one on her in an annoying (and innocent way). I finally told him to quit and to save his kisses for his wife. That whoever he married someday wouldn't be so happy that he gave away so many kissed to Rebekah when he was 7. "Well what if I marry her?" was his as usual smart alec response. At which she reminded him that there was no way she was going to marry him. Then he proceeds to tell me that no one wants to marry him, that all girls think boys are ugly and gross. Now Rebekah did chime in that she thinks boys are beautiful. So then Parker changed gears and instead of kissing her, tried picking his nose in front of her, seriously debating whether he should wipe a booger on her. Nice, Parker, real lady killer, wonder why Rebekah called you gross and disgusting.

Sleepover Fun

Oh how fun 7 year old boys are. If you haven't had one around you in a while, they are a funny breed. And you kinda think your's is the only dorky one, until you get them together and see the symphony of fun and dorky all put together. They laugh at the littlest of things, bodily noises, dumb jokes, funny sounds, physical comedy. And they seem to be trying to one up each other in everything, especially in the realm of laughs. Thus started our night, our first sleepover with 2 other wonderful dorky little boys (and I do say dorky with all the love in my heart). On the way back to our house from picking them up, they filled the back seat with loud squeels and the aforementioned dumb jokes. Parker especially was crazy, bouncing around trying to make his friends laugh with any little comment. Thankfully he sort of chilled out by the time he got home. It was interesting watching the dynamics. You could definitely tell the other two had older siblings, they were much wiser in the ways of the world, well in the ways of their christian school world. Parker was singing some rhymig song and would stumble upon a bad word on accident, like when he was rhyming something to Ritch. He had no idea it was a bad word but the other too were quick to point it out. It was kinda cute though, they begged him not to say that word anymore, that is wasn't a good word. They were the cuss police. And funny thing the next song was them quoting all the books of the Bible they had learned at school. I was cracking up from the front seat. Listening to them debate what came after 1 Corinthians was comical as I'm pretty sure this was the first time in the history of 2nd grade boy sleepovers this had been done. Anyhoo. I digress. We went home had pizza, rootbeer and cheese puffs. (have you ever tried to have just one handful of cheesepuffs, impossible). They played some Wii NBA basketball. Another opportunity for the other boys to show their higher level of maturity. They knew every player, team, and move and smack talking. At one point one little boy yelled out after a slam dunk, "That's how I roll, suckas, Lebron's the man". parker had no idea what they were talking about or even how to play the game, he had always been content playing 1990's version of double dribble with his dad. And as he shied away from playing, readily confessing he didn't know how, they were so sweet to encourage him to try and that they would show him what to do. They really were sweet boys. Not one bit of fighting, bickering, gossip, drama, malice and so forth, quite different from my sleepover days. After video games we went outside to build a fire and roast marshmallows. They were hysterical out there too, in typical 7 year old boy fashion. And another highlight of the evening was that one boy (while I ran inside) peed on the fire to help it go out. Priceless.  A huge wrestling fest took place at jammy time, that was my favorite part. I see my boys wrestle with Ritchey all the time, but this was way better. No fake daddy moves, no letting the other guy win, even Cooper jumped on the dog pile. They were giggling like little girls. One boy had no modesty in changing clothes (same kid who peed on the fire), another brought along cologne so he could smell better, and Parker got dressed behind his chair. We popped in a movie and finally turned out the lights on 3 tired boys at a 11 p.m. And of course everyone was up by 7 a.m. I put myself thru the torture of making star wars pancakes again, served up with chocolate milk. And after breakfast, more wii, more outside play and after a  lego building contest, the boys were gone. And it was a ton of fun. Such sweet, fun loving, innocent little boys. I loved it and so did Parker, and Cooper for that matter since they were kind enough to include him on almost everything. We will definitely do a sleepover again, maybe not too soon, since it left in its wake 2 very tired and crabby boys. And actually Cooper 2 days later has been in bed all day with a 102 degree temp. Probably not related, but the lack of sleep probably didn't help his immune system. Yay for little boys, frogs and snails and puppy dog tails. Enjoy the pics and brief clip of the future of WWF.

Highs and Lows of Motherhood

Ok- First the high moment before I share my low moment.
I have a new trick for clean up time around the house. Our basic 5 o'clock clean up that I have shared about in the past was getting kind of old and routine, still working, but just not as motivating. I used to give them each 2 rooms to clean in their entirety (yes everyday at 5 p.m.) If they did a great job without 3 strikes they won dessert for the night. Strikes came from getting off track, constant reminding and a poor job in the end. Anyhoo, I got this latest twist from a genius teacher who knows how to get little kids to clean up a kindergarten room. I now tell my boys that there is a secret item laying around somewhere that needs to be cleaned up. I set the timer for 15 minutes and whoever happens to clean up the secret item I am thinking of, they get the prize. (Candy out of the halloween bag) It has worked great. They scurry around quickly (which was one way the old way was getting old, they were taking forever and lost their scurrying drive) trying to pick up more than the other in hopes that they cleaned up the secret item. One day it was a spoon lying in the middle of the toy room, another day it was a picture album under the art table. Now unfortunately Parker has picked the item up every time. But he is my wonderful boy who then always chooses a candy with multiple pieces so he can share with the very sad Cooper and mooch Sophie. But tonight I am going to have to stack the deck in favor of my little redheaded sweetpea. I'll just say the secret item is something that I saw him specifically pick up- cuz that is true motherhood love. yay for my clean house!

Ok, for my low. So I got totally shot down today by a teacher in my efforts to be a stellar party planning room mom. I'm not really the room mom, there isn't one. And for many reasons too long to go into here, Parker's class has been a bit discombobulated (I'm sure I nailed the spelling of that!) and has kind of gotten the raw end of the deal in a lot of areas. But that is life. So when the teacher asked me if I could help plan their thanksgiving party, I did what comes naturally, kinda waivered and wanted to bail. But Ritchey reminded me that this is why I am a stay at home mom, so I can do all these wonderful stay at home, kid supportive things. Ok, does this mean I have to get off my bum, put the bon bons away and turn off Oprah. Just kidding of course. So with Ritchey's little pep talk I embraced the idea and got planning. I was going to plan the best party ever for them. I placed phone calls, got prices, made lists. Then I called the sort of teacher (long story) and gave her my ideas. And can I say they were all completely shot down! Yes! She has her mind set on a certain event type and venue, and mine were definetely not along those lines. So God bless her for feeling the freedom to say no thank you. But man, I must admit I was pretty taken a back, bummed and a little frustrated. So there ya go. My first time trying to be all miss room mom, didn't go so well. Their day will be fine, and I"ll still help out where needed, but guess I won't get to do what I do best,  plan and organize the whole shebang.

So there ya go, the day in the life of a stay at home mom.